Neither Borrower Nor Lender Be

Neither A Borrower Nor A Lender Be

Neither A Borrower Nor A Lender Be. What does this actually mean? Where is it from and how does it relate to our lives at the moment?

Shakespeare

It is a Shakespearean quote:

Polonius in Act-I, Scene-III of the play, Hamlet, counsels his son Laertes before he embarks on his visit to Paris. “Neither a borrower nor a lender be; For loan oft loses both itself and friend.”

It means do not lend or borrow money from a friend, because if you do so, you will lose both your friend and your money. If you lend, he will avoid paying back, and if you borrow you will fall out of your savings, as you turn into a spendthrift, and face humiliation.

Integrity

It mentions friend, but I reckon it is more universal than that.

I believe it touches on honesty and trust by which I mean integrity; elements of our lives of which we need to be more aware.

I have been thinking about this quite a bit lately, and figure that the definitions of these terms might have slipped from our conscious minds.

Let’s reacquaint our selves with them, shall we?

Definitions

Honesty: (Wikipedia) Honesty is a facet of moral character that connotes positive and virtuous attributes such as integrity, truthfulness, straightforwardness, including straightforwardness of conduct, along with the absence of lying, cheating, theft, etc. Honesty also involves being trustworthy, loyal, fair, and sincere.

Trust: (Wikipedia) Confidence in or dependence on a person or quality. The assured reliance on the character, ability, strength, or truth of someone or something.

Integrity: (Wikipedia) The practice of being honest and showing consistent and uncompromising adherence to strong moral and ethical principles and values. In ethics, integrity is regarded as the honesty and truthfulness or accuracy of one's actions.

All of these include the word TRUTH. Or TRUTHFULNESS. Co-incidence? I think not.

Top Value

My top value in life is Integrity.

And it would seem to include the other sentiments of Trust and Honesty as its mainstays.

Let’s have a think about Integrity.

Integrity again

It says, “having strong moral and ethical principles”. Well even that’s difficult, isn’t it? Both can be very subjective. What’s moral to one is completely against the odds for others. For example ‘Jihads’ and ‘An eye for an eye’.

Ethics is much more strongly defined and thus a better gauge, but ‘honesty and truthfulness or accuracy of one's actions’. Makes sense, doesn’t it?

Means you do as you say. Can’t be clearer than that.

So I guess a Jihadist who truly believes that what he says he is going to do in the name of his religion, or his God, and follows through; is acting with integrity. Interesting point?

Listen

Comes down to the fact we all must listen and think before we react. Not everyone is like us. I mean each human on this planet is UNIQUE and stands for something. We are all important. We all have our own values – sometimes our issue might be we actually don’t know what these values are, and this makes life a little fraught, but that is for another time. Perhaps we can discuss values again soon if you like.

Think Before We React

Be aware. Be grateful, be less judgemental, and remember that while we cannot control circumstances external to us (and that means other people too, who have different, even extreme views - and are entitled to them), we can control how we react to them. Those who react completely from emotion with no checks (ie is your reaction Logical, True, and Constructive – all 3 MUST be present), are really no better than those they criticise.

Just sayin’. What do you think?

How to Stop Overthinking Charles P Carlton

How to Stop Overthinking - 8 Proven, Practical Techniques to End Anxiety, Stop Negative Thinking, Overcome Worrying and Live a Healthier, Happier Life – Charles P Carlton

Powerful CoverStop Overthinking

Wow. This book started with an extremely POWERFUL cover design. Loved it.

Much of what was covered, I thought I knew, but as I continued I realised that’s my problem. If you think you know stuff you never learn anything. When you talk you say things you know, but when you listen, that’s when the magic happens.

Magic

Thanks, Charles. You magician you.

I began to read this book with my ears wide open and the gems just kept on coming.

Mindfulness

The chapter on mindfulness made it worth the purchase of the whole book. It was masterful. The style of writing was informative firstly, but more importantly, it was contemplative, calming, meditative and relaxing. I loved the info but also the very feel of it. It was well done.

Powerful cover, great message, inspired writing style? I’d say it had it all.

Depression, Anxiety & Compassion

How To Overcome The Fear Of Change

Loneliness

Loneliness in a small town

Loneliness in A Small Town

Loneliness defined: sadness because one has no friends or company.

Synonyms: isolation, friendlessness, lack of friends/companions, forsakenness, abandonment, rejection.

The other day I read an interview with a woman who was explaining how hard it had been for her to assimilate into life in the country.

Some quotes

“She started a little way out of town and didn’t drive. That was a problem right there. Her husband was in town most days and she was alone for eight hours a day with limited TV and internet, zero garden to speak of, and she read a lot of books and hung out with the poor old cat.”

After moving to town, and unpacking she says, “The stress of the previous months, saying goodbye to our treasured 20-year-old cat who had kept me company, and facing a close-knit, small-town completely overwhelmed me. I felt lonely. Isolated.

Meanwhile, My husband had become involved with the golf club, was heavily involved with the SES and had made about a quizzillion new friends”.

Contribution

She went on to say, “Over the next two years, everything deteriorated. I was lonely, but I didn’t want to join a group or association for the wrong reasons. I only wanted to get involved if I could actually contribute, and wasn’t feeling there was much I could contribute. I was invited to events with my husband’s friends, but didn’t want to go – getting made-up to go out and being sociable seemed too big of a climb. Instead, I’d stay home with a bottle of wine. I had no problem cracking open the wine at 11:00 am. I’d always been a bit of a party girl and remained so long after the days of long work lunches and a couple of nights a week at the pub.”

“Deep down I knew I wasn’t right. I’ve never been a patient person, but I became extremely intolerant. If something frustrated me, I’d pick up whatever was handy and hurl it across the room, right down to a nine-kilo bag of kitty litter once or twice! My poor long-suffering husband”

Professional Help

To cut a long story short she sought professional help and began the long climb out of the alcoholic tunnel and into a new life.

She learned the following: “Things that are my fault, I can change. Things that are not my fault or impossible to change, there’s absolutely no point dwelling on and I have to put them aside. Then I get to work on fixing the things I can.

I tackle my loneliness. Instead of saying no to events with her husband or a night at the pub, I go along. I still don’t have any close friends here, but I’m getting better at meeting people”.

Responsibility / Mindset

It’s all about taking responsibility and changing your mindset.

I noticed her comment early on that she didn’t want to join groups for the wrong reasons. Really? What could be the wrong reason? Oh. OK. She went on and said she didn’t think she had anything to contribute. Mindset again.

We all have something to contribute. New ideas and help are always in demand in community groups.

Couldn't be Bothered

And couldn’t be bothered going out? I’m sorry – but I can’t accept a person saying they are lonely and yet giving up chances to be part of a social occasion. Especially when they are to be accompanied by another trusted person. It is virtually risk-free.

When asked about what she missed in the city she had left behind she cited a bagel shop, and a fish and chip shop. We do have those here but apparently not up to her standard. Again mindset.

I bet she had to VISIT a number of places to find the ones she liked in the city, but expected, it seems, new wondrous delights to just jump out and bite her on the bum.

Big City Illusion

Because of the large number of people, events, shops, bars etc in a big city everything seems so much easier. It is an illusion. YOU must still go out and partake of these things. With an open mind. If not, you will be lonely there too. In fact, research often shows that loneliness is a greater problem in cities – perhaps due to overwhelm.

Be A Joiner

To make your life come alive in a small town, you need to be a joiner. Get out and about. Join any group that will have you. Volunteer to help wherever possible. Councils have whole volunteer departments – meals on wheels and many other opportunities.

Go to pubs and coffee shops, listen to music. Be seen. Soon people will speak to you because you are there. Loneliness is sadness because you have no friends or company. So says the definition with which we started this article. You can’t find friends or company sitting at home behind closed doors.

Learning to drive is a necessity in a country town and a whole lot less stressful and much safer than in a big city. Bite the bullet. Don’t sit on your hands and do nothing and expect anything to change.

Go Out with a book

I began here in town, alone, sitting in a beer garden nursing a single glass of wine, reading a book and soon I found people to talk to.

I started doing things I liked and making them available to people in town. I did things outside my comfort zone. And I have many friends now. Have been invited to birthday parties and other social occasions. I can’t go into the supermarket without being recognised and often stopped to be engaged in a short conversation. It is very nice.

Is this because I’m special? Of course not. It is because I have been SEEN and I have been going stuff in town.

Warm Body

My advice and the point of this article is ‘Get out and about’. Join. Don’t worry about the reason. Mix it up with the other human beings. Perhaps some of them are EXACTLY like you and just need another warm body to talk to.

Nothing Changes By Sitting On Your Hands

 

Learning. What Did You Learn Today?

Learning. What Did You Learn Today?

Just been reading about Metropolitan Opera star Rise Stevens, an American operatic mezzo-soprano. Beginning in 1938, she sang for the Metropolitan Opera in New York City for more than two decades during the 1940s and 1950s. She was most noted for her portrayals of the central character in Carmen by Georges Bizet.

Once, when she failed an audition, she realised she had a lot to learn. One of the things was more languages because opera singers often sing in languages such as German or Italian and others don't they?

Required Learnings Not Always Obvious

Made me think. Sometimes what we need to learn is not immediately obvious. An opera singer needs to expand her voice range. goes without saying. Expanding your languages, less so.

Me (And You)

I think I need to look around me at what is happening and perhaps the learning I need is equally not obvious. Much food for thought as I ate my breakfast this Friday morning.

What Did You Learn Today?

Powerful Words

Some Great Book Suggestions

Books to read that may CHANGE YOUR LIFE

Powerful WordsFriends, I read a lotta books, many in the self-help genre. Many of these have caused me to change my life in some way.

Some by doing something differently, some by stopping doing something, and a few by adding something to the way I live my life.

Have a look and see if any resonate with you.

Some Great Book Suggestions

Remember, when self-help pundits say you need a mentor, they are right, but it needn't be someone you know. You may wish to follow an author and read all or most of his/her books and take the ideas on board. That is mentorship at its best. I talked about this in a couple of articles referenced below.

Get A Mentor #1      Get A Mentor #2

Disclaimer / Disclosure

Change Your Life for Good PAME Code

Change Your Life for Good with the PAME Code of Purpose, Action, Momentum, and Energy: You Can Do It, Book 1 by Dr. E V. Estacio

Change Your Lofe - PAME CodeIn spite of the title, this is really quite a simple book.

PAME

The acronym PAME is the basis for book 1 of a 3 book series ending with Fear Is Not My Enemy.

Dr Estacio is a #1 best selling author, speaker, life and leadership coach, and founder of the PAME Code. She is a psychologist who helps people embrace their true worth, so they can lkive happy and fulfilling lives.

Free Bonus

There is a free bonus offered in the first few pages 60 Motivational quotes from remarkable individuals from all over the world. But it doesn’t end there. You get invited to join a Facebook group where you can get ongoing support from the author and heaps of people just like you who realise they need help. Reader communication. Very nice. Thank you

Dr Estacio starts with a very personal story, this way you know she is for real.

She moves into instructions of how to use the book, and from there it just takes off.

Colour Coded Panels

There are lots of little colour coded panels embedded within the text adding to the ease of reading, understanding and utilising the techniques to ensure you have every opportunity to come out the other end.

The PAME Code is an acronym you will need to remember. It is a simple pathway into understanding how to make your life great again. There are others you will be introduced to that are equally as fantastic.

We move from establishing our purpose to looking at our goals, and then realising that from beginning to end it all depends on ACTION. If nothing changes – nothing changes.

12 Practical Tips

The final chapter gives you 12 practical tips that you can use to keep your spirits up as you pursue your purpose in life.

The book is so full of information, tips, tricks, links to even more information that I am sure you will want to read it more than once. I loved it and keep it handy. I have the PAME Code written on my whiteboard next to me at all times.

Thank You Dr Estacio.

The Imposter Syndrome Remedy

Fear Is Not My Enemy

 

Change and The Miracle Morning

The Miracle Morning & Change.

Change is on the horizon.

What if?

What if you could miraculously wake up tomorrow and any - or every area of your life was transformed? Notice the diffences. What wouldThe Miracle Morning have changed? Would you be happier? Healthier? More successful? In better shape? Would you have more energy? Less Stress? More Money? Better relationships? Which of your problems would be solved? What if I told you that there is a "not-so-obvious" secret that is guaranteed to transform any - or literally every area of your life, faster than you ever thought possible?

Enter ‘The Miracle Morning’, by Hal Elrod. What's now being practised by thousands of people around the world could perhaps be the simplest approach to creating the life you've always wanted. It's been right there in front of us, Are you ready? The next chapter of your life - the most extraordinary life you've ever imagined - is about to begin. You deserve an extraordinary life. It's time to wake up to your full potential. Change your life for the better.

Review

My full review of this wonderful book will follow in a later post.

But let me tell you about how it is working for me. Hal Elrod sets up a series of activities one needs to do for an hour each morning under the acronym savers.

SAVERS

I have been pursuing this technique for nearly two months now.

Following what is written in the book, I get up, mostly when the alarm goes off; pop into the bathroom, wash my face, brush my teeth, comb my hair, rinse my mouth with mouthwash - all things which were in the book and then begin my one hour (the 6 * 10 mins) SAVERS morning routine.

Silence

It starts with 10 minutes of Silence. I sit concentrating on my breathing - breathing in breathing out. Then I apply the yoga method of alternate nostril breathing which is possible. Hard but possible. I breathe in one nostril out the other, in and out I make lots of funny faces doing it but there's no one here to watch me. It takes a LOT of concentration. But that is actually the point. As the conscious mind can only handle one thing at a time, the level of effort required to practise this breathing technique eschews the brain’s ability to think other thoughts. There’s your silence right there. More about this below.

Inner Self

After this, I begin the practice of getting in touch with my inner-self. Interestingly, I notice my face seems to feel different each side. Dunno why. Perhaps I am a two-faced son-of-a-bitch. Then I concentrate on listening. I imagine a funnel, a large one, in my ear bringing all the sounds from outside and around me into that ear. After some time I visualise the same on the other side.

Body Scan

Then I do the practice in meditation they call the 'body scan'. I start with the top of my head and make like I'm relaxing everything about my body dropping down to a different part, eyelids, face, mouth, jaw, neck, shoulders, arms all the way down to my toes. Many times during this thoughts and ideas from all parts of my life push into my brain. I allow them for a short time until I realise what is happening and then shut them out by concentrating on breathing again. Repeat as necessary. At this time I also follow some healing visualisations, but more about that in a later piece. In what seems like no time the alarm goes on my watch to say I have done 10 minutes.

Affirmations

Then I do Affirmations. No problem choosing affirmations they're all in the separate downloads that you get FREE with the Miracle Morning book. Just combine them all together, and read them out loud, slowly, thinking about them, takes 10 minutes. Change them after you have followed the pattern for a few days. I added some leadership affirmations from Tony Robbins and ‘The Secrets of the Millionaire Mind’ Declarations. Delete those that do not resonate with you. Find a place where this won’t disturb anyone else in your home. Outside in the shed, if you have to. This and the E for exercise are the only parts of this technique that might disturb anyone else. You can also do them later when it suits all concerned.

Visualising

The vision board is simply envisaging in your mind’s eye (but not just seeing - smelling, hearing, feeling, touching as well), all the things that you wish to be, do or have in your life. Mine are below. Make yours up as the mood takes you. I keep it in my mind’s eye, a virtual vision board, if you will, still the same: with pictures, quotes and the whole 9 yards, but not real. I bought all the stuff to make a real one, but it is still stored behind my bedroom door.

My board includes the homes I wish to have, the holidays I am going to take my family on. A vision of how I want to look body wise, the writing I want to complete, the speaking I want to do. I also envisage a couple of my projects being finished successfully. If you get through that before the 10 min alarm goes you start it from the top again. There are a few techniques to help make this section even more relevant and more likely to have positive results. But that is for another time.

Reading

I skip the exercise at this point and go to the Reading. Currently, I am reading a book on writing, one on Habits, and ‘The One Thing’ by Gary Keller. I am a writer.

Scribing

After this reading, I go to my desk and write or journal, exactly as instructed in the Miracle Morning book, under the second S for Scribe, for 10 minutes.

(There is a list of 11 scribing exercises a member of The Miracle Morning FaceBook group has written to assist greatly in this part of SAVERS. I’ll ask his permission to share it here for your reading delight, and scribing assistance).

Exercise

Finally, I do the Exercise. 10 minutes, made up of 3 minutes planking, 4 minutes running on the spot, (I do this while at the same time putting on the coffee and dropping bread into the toaster) and 3 minutes exercise on my gym ball. Then it's time for breakfast. Now 2 or 3 mornings a week I go swimming and Thursday mornings I have yoga, so that forms the E for those days. Nothing else is required.

What does this all mean? I get up an hour before I need to do anything else during the day.

WHY

If this is not working out for you, then the only thing you might be missing is a big WHY. You get up to go to work because you have to. That is your why. The alarm goes off at 7 o'clock so you can do the required stuff and be at work at 9; because you have to. I repeat; that is your why. If you have no why you'll never get up, you will simply press snooze, over and over. You will get fired if you continue to do this. A big WHY right there.

Imagine

Your house is on fire at 3:30 am in the morning. You wake up smelling smoke. You cannot hold your hand up and say, “Snooze this fire, I am not ready to get up”. No! You must immediately bounce out of bed, react to the emergency and do all the necessary things. Wake up other people and animals. Get dressed. Collect important documents. Take whatever else you have time for. No coffee. No easing into it. No excuses such as, ‘I am NOT a morning person’. Just action. Full on. That is a huge WHY right there. And you WILL do it. Guaranteed.

Possibly 24 hours later you might get to sleep in someone else's house.

If you have a WHY that is big enough you won't even need the alarm. If you don't, then this is possibly not the right technique for you. We can talk about WHY later. But in the meanwhile Google and get hold of any book entitled something like, Know your why, or Find or why. They will be very helpful.

Extra Years

I have found, that following the steps in The Miracle Morning book, I am consistently getting up 3 hours before I normally would. Over the next 20 years, this will give me over 2 years extra in my life. At 70 years of age that is magnificent. Thank you Hal Elrod.

Change is Different

Change is Different

Change is DifferentWe are going to talk about change again today. In it's most basic form it is just another word for different. You wake up one morning to blue sky, wake up the next to clouds. The sky is different. It has changed. The weather has changed. We as humans need to adjust to that change. That difference. These differences can happen in widely spaced time-frames from years apart to a few seconds.

External

Many changes occur in the environment the external world if you will. Mostly you have very little control over these. You need to accept them or not. Your choice.

External changes can be initiated by nature, governments, businesses and other people. Many examples of these occur each and every day. One example - technology. We as a race (the human race) are always on the lookout for something better. Of course better is subjective A value judgement. The outcome of the change might not be to your liking. You might hate the change. Take mobile phones as an example. You might regret that they were ever invented. But here they are. Like em or hate em. That ship has sailed. The change has started and will continue to roll on.

Internal

Other changes are internally driven. They come from your mind. Often driven by a wish to be, do, or have something different. There's that word again.

Action

If we want to have a different body shape, for example, that will constitute a change. But this difference or change will not happen just by thinking about it, in spite of ‘The Secret’ and ‘Manifesting’, and all that. Some kind of action is usually required as well. Perhaps some dietary changes, increased exercise. Action is required with all things if we wish the outcome to be different from what it is currently, to change. These changes are driven by our mind. Nothing else and nobody else controls this. Just our mind. Internal changes again. We do them all the time. Every hour of everyday.

Good or Bad

Good or bad changes or differences are value judgements we make based on the rewards or lack of them that we receive or don’t receive, after the changes have been made.

Change Resistors

It is interesting when you listen to the thoughts of the ‘change resistors’ amongst us who rail, for example, against mobile phone use and the younger set. Their main arguments, or one of them at least, is that these kids don't communicate anymore.

Communication

Of course they do. If they are using their phone to text or use social media they are most certainly communicating. Just in a different way.

Talking

Face-to-face vocal communication is very limiting. You can communicate only one-on-one generally, sometimes small groups. Everyone needs to be together, in the same place at the same time. Whereas the youngsters are mixing it with often large numbers of people of many different ages, religions, races, etc. Many different conversations can be held in very short time-frames with people in large numbers in different locations. This is communication in a much bigger sense then the old one-on-one of talking. Of course they can and often do this larger communication thing, at the same time as talking to friends in the old fashioned way.

Is Change Always Good?

There are many changes like that mentioned above, in the way of doing things, that many among us do not like. They want to revert to older, different times. That word again. Change is not always good - we all know that, (in itself, this is a subjective phrase isn't it?) Tomahto, tomayto; potahto, potayto .

Learn to live and accept change. It is here to stay. See Dan Walsh  - Constant Change Is Here to Stay.

Misadventures of a 1970s Childhood by Tom Purcell

Misadventures of a 1970s Childhood: My David Cassidy Hair by Tom Purcell

Misadventures, this book includes 16 vignettes of life in the 70's for the author, as remembered more than 40 years later. It covers such wondrous events as bike jumps, sled vengeance, puppy love, the dog that ran away, the kid left at the drive-in, clogged toilets and so much more.Misadventures

A glorious journey back to a time before our currently fear based society when kids could be kids and FUN was not a four letter word.

I even cried a bit (just a bit mind – I am a man) at one point, and laughed a lot. It is funny, poignant, true, sad and not to be missed.

I can remember some of the stuff in here as if it were yesterday even though it is Middle America and so far from my childhood NZ that it is ridiculous. Perhaps kids then were the same the world over. I'd like to think so.

It is a divine little book.

Life Plan – How to write

Life Plan - What is it?

A life plan is a detailed description of your decisions, intentions, hopes and dreams for your future. Life PlanEducational pursuits, career aspirations, recreational interests, marital life, children and end-of-life preferences are common subjects to address in a life plan. A detailed life plan is instructive for creating greater clarity regarding life prior

ities and next steps. The following are things to consider when writing a life plan.

Understand your needs.

  • List your mental, emotional and spiritual needs. Being surrounded by loving and caring people may be one emotional need. Wanting independence and freedom from the control of others may be another need. Feeling connected to a spiritual or religious organization may be yet another need.
  • Pinpoint your physical and material needs. Being healthy and fit is one example. Living in an environment that is free of pollution may be another need. Living debt-free or accumulating wealth may be material needs.

Identify your strengths and talents.

  • If you are a student, think about the subjects in which you excel. Your strengths may be in analysis, language composition, computation, information retention or problem solving.
  • If you are already in a career, think about the tasks that you do well, such as solving interpersonal issues, leading others, building things or answering people's questions.

Consider your hopes and dreams.

These are aspects of life that give you joy.

  • Falling in love,
  • having children,
  • having a pet,
  • contributing to a worthy cause and
  • devising a solution to society's difficult problems are some examples.

Decide on a format before writing your life plan.

Your life plan may be written in a narrative or outline form.

Use your list of needs, strengths and hopes to outline concrete goals.

For example:

  • the need to be fit and healthy might lead to a career in fitness or simply a commitment to exercise several times per week.
  • Your talent with numbers and analysis may drive you to pursue a career as a financial analyst.

Use the list you created to set practical life goals.

Review your life goals to make sure they address all aspects of your life.

A thorough life plan addresses

  • education,
  • career,
  • play,
  • hobbies,
  • relationships,
  • children,
  • spiritual pursuits and even
  • end-of-life preferences.

Decisions about how your dependents will survive financially after you are gone and how your funeral should be handled are important considerations when writing a life plan.

Examine the details of your life plan.

Review each category to ensure that you have addressed it thoroughly.

  • For example, if you plan to become a doctor, write down the names of the school(s) you plan to attend, your desired specialty, where you'd like to do your medical residency, and whether you'd like to work at a hospital, a private practice or for the government.

The details can always be adjusted as your life progresses, but thinking through them ahead of time will help to crystallize a plan of action.

According to Michael Hyatt

'When it comes to life, most people are spectators. They watch events unfold a day at a time. They may plan their careers, the building of a new home, or even a vacation, but it never occurs to them to plan their life.'

'They are reactive rather than proactive.'

As a result, they drift along, often to destinations they would have never consciously chosen: failing health, a broken marriage, or a stalled career. But it doesn’t have to be this way.

In fact, most people spend more time planning a one-week vacation than they spend planning their life.

This is why so many people end up discouraged, disillusioned, and wondering what went wrong. They arrived at the wrong destination.

The good news is that it doesn’t have to be this way. You can live your life on purpose by creating your own personal life plan.

3 Reasons Why do you need a life plan?

  1. It will give you clarity about where your life is headed.
  2. It will keep you in balance when things get crazy.
  3. It will give you peace of mind, knowing you are are addressing those aspects of your life that matter most.

A Life plan will help you:

  • Understand why most people end up at destinations they didn’t consciously chose and die with regrets.
  • Avoid this outcome by developing a written life plan that puts into words what you want in each of the major areas of life.
  • Develop a clear set of written priorities that will equip you to make better decisions in real time.
  • Set aside a day to go through the life plan exercise and emerge from that experience with a short, compelling plan for moving them from where you are to where you want to be.
  • Follow-through on your plans and implement a strategy for keeping it alive.

What Did You Learn Today?

Get A Mentor #2

Get A Mentor #2

What do I need a mentor for? Or if you consider Sir Winston Churchill a mentor: “For what do I need a Mentor?

MentorWHY

We last talked about who or what a mentor might be, and we found that without knowing why you want/need a mentor, you may not be able to answer this seemingly simple question.

FIRST, we must delve into our WHY. Why we are doing what we are doing, and why doing it, might be better if we had a mentor. Whatever that mentor turns out be.

A few years ago, I went to a seminar about something, and at the end they asked for questions. My problem was, I understood so little of what was being discussed, I had no way of articulating a question that made any sense at all.

This is the same problem with a mentor if you don’t know what is happening in your life and why – no advice can be requested, because: what do you actually ask?

Our why has been postulated as an acronym of the word itself: What Hurts You?

What Hurts You?

Seems like a great place to start. In Business, In Personal Relationships, in our community or living in general, if we can be specific about what is hurting us physically, mentally, emotionally or socially, then we will be able to come up with some questions to ask a would be mentor.

Pick one to start with. Let’s say business. Then perhaps we decide fear is hurting us.

  • Fear of rejection
  • failure
  • success
  • the unknown
  • other people’s opinions
  • not being good enough.
  • etc

NOW we can generate some questions. THEN we can begin the task of deciding on a mentor.

HELP

We need help. Now we know what kind of help, we can begin to figure out who or what can provide that assistance. That’s how we chose a mentor. Who can answer the questions which the above analysis brings to the fore? No platitudes, no Bull Shit. Just simple answers and simple actions, befitting simple minds. Makes it easy.

We can use books, audios, videos, live seminars, 1:1 meetings (in person, Zoom, Skype or even just the plain old phone.) Now that we know the questions the answers are easy to search out. Our source(s) is/are our mentor(s).

Do you have to approach some big-wig in your business or life circle and say, “Will you be my Mentor?” NO! Phew. That’s a relief!!!

You just ask simple specific questions, get simple straight-forward answers.

Whom do you ask?

Great question. Whom do you ask? That’s where research comes in. Obviously someone you respect, someone who has an area of expertise where you need answers; but this someone doesn’t even need to be alive any more. Sir Winston Churchill, “NEVER, Never, Never give up”, for example. Is that not mentorship?

Definition

We define a mentor as someone who gives help and advice over time. Someone who is detached and disinterested and can hold a mirror up to us. Books and all the other resources we have already mentioned come into play here. It doesn’t say you have to be able to speak to or meet with this mentor. It doesn’t say that. It might be better in a few cases, where feedback is required for example, but doesn’t seem totally necessary in all cases. Does it?

Coffee

I think we get hung up on the real when it comes to a mentor. It is expertise, experience, advice and answers for which we are clamouring, not shared cups of coffee.

Get A Mentor #1

What Did You Learn Today

Nothing Changes By Sitting On Your Hands

Have you been in a situation where things are not as you would like them to be and yet you DO NOTHING about it?  You sit on your hands?

Action

Unfortunately ACTION is necessary before anything changes. Change is not easy, but it is much harder if you sit on your hands. OK. Read impossible.

It may be you don’t agree with someone in your family; perhaps how they are handling a particularly difficult relationship with their kids or grandkids?

Perhaps it is a person in ‘sort of’ authority as an office bearer in a local committee, or maybe a commercial thing like an apparent slight you have received from a local business?

Example

A while ago, as a member of a local committee, I attempted to enlist the help of another for a project related to the committee I was on, but in reality, more closely linked to a program I was developing personally. He refused to help me because the organisation, of which I was a member, had a tie-in to my undertaking, and he hated the President of that organisation.

“I will have NOTHING whatsoever, to do with any venture that is even remotely connected to that man,” he said.

To say I was flabbergasted is only half the story. I felt shocked that a person would allow another man to so control his life that he would not help someone else, because of a tenuous link between the two. “I would LOVE to help,” he said, “but not while that bastard is President.”

He wanted the President to change, so he could be involved again, but would not do a single thing to help until then. Really? How does that work?

Cutting off Your Nose to Spite Your Face

My mother used to call this ‘cutting off your nose to spite your face’.

In other words, he wanted change, and was completely happy to help, but was opposed to a certain individual and wasn’t prepared to take any steps toward assisting that change, or working towards a viable alternative, while that person held a role, any role. He wanted change NOW but without any effort on his part. Doesn’t work that way.

Take Steps

I, like you, can think of very many times when things changed after ACTION by interested parties. When those with a vested interest, took some steps toward a solution. Things happen. I don’t mean huge street demomstrations or strikes that affect those really working towards a sensible solution, but steps, courses of action, which move the situation towards a resolution.

There is no “some-one else” in this equation. We must all work toward attaining the state that everyone wants.

Insanity

Albert Einstein is broadly credited with exclaiming “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, but expecting different results”. And doing NOTHING because you don’t like something or someone; is not going to change anything. It is expecting things to change while doing the same thing. Nothing. Insanity.

Doing Nothing is a Decision

Sitting on your hands will NOT result in anything, other than warm hands. Doing nothing is a decision

not the boss of me

What’s it all about? We are in Control of our lives!

I had my leg over the edge. 22nd floor. St Kilda Rd.

Up and Over

I was going to do it this time. Jump off the building. After the bankruptcy, the retrenchment and the Government taking almost all my payout, there was nothing left. It was hopeless. I had even lost the $1M insurance policy I had been contributing to for the last 48 years to leave my children a nest egg. I started this 13 years before they were even born. My very existence was a washout. 64 years of living - down the tubes. Or down to St Kilda Rd, at least. My life sucked. Big time. And it was not my fault!

The beginning of the Comeback

Not sure why. But I climbed down from that railing.

I went to the Doctor, and the Doctor said – "Take these drugs, See a Healer of the Head.” (You can sing this one to yourself if you like! And dance a bit too. It works!)

And I did.

AND Then: someone showed me a video of this man. (No Arms No Legs - No Worries

Nicholas Vujicic (Voya chic) An Australian Preacher and Motivational speaker born without any limbs. As a child, he struggled mentally and emotionally, as well as physically. Who would have guessed?

But he eventually came to terms with his disability.

Did You Get That? “He eventually came to terms with his disability.” How inspiring is that?

What was thinking. My issues were NOTHING in comparison to that. Yeah, of course it's real allright. To me. But Gee wizz. Where do you go from here?

If he could do that – handle that, who could deal with the relatively insignificant issues that I was facing?

ANYBODY!

Inspiration To Go On

Since then. I have walked on hot coals. Twice.  Really.

And as if I needed further inspiration, these 9 people kept cropping up in my reading.

Nine People

Albert Ellis, Anthony Robbins, Dale Carnegie, Dr Phil, Dr Wayne Dyer, Jim Rohn, Shakespeare, Susan Jeffers and Zig Ziglar.

What do they all have in common I hear you ask? Let me explain.

They all believed in one simple truth. One that I had failed to understand Up until THEN!!

Let's read their own words so we can understand what this truth might be shall we?

Albert Ellis: In 1955 he developed REBT (Rational Emotive Behavioural Therapy) the main principle of which was – A person is rarely affected emotionally by outside things, but rather by 'perceptions, attitudes or internalised sentences' about outside things and events.

Anthony Robbins: Whom the NY times calls 'The High Priest of Human Potential' says – There are two worlds. The EXTERNAL world which we can INFLUENCE, (We cannot control the external world) and the INTERNAL world which we do control. Therefore our ultimate significance in life comes not from something external but something internal.

Dale Carnegie: Happiness doesn't depend on any external conditions, it is governed by our mental attitude.

Dr Phil: Unlike the external factors that we have no control over, our internal factors are made up of our own reactions to the events in our lives.

Dr. Wayne Dyer: (Oh this one is really good!!!) Change the way you look at things, and the things you look at change.

Are you getting where this is going? I certainly was.

Jim Rohn: You must take personal responsibility. You cannot change the circumstances, the seasons, or the wind. But you can change the set of your sail. The same wind blows on us all, whether we win or lose depends on the set of our sail.

Shakespeare: (Hamlet, Act II, Scene II) … there is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.

Susan Jeffers: (in her best-selling book  'Feel the Fear, and Do it Anyway') says  - Don't be deceived into thinking that by changing the external, the internal will be changed. It works the other way around.

And Finally

Zig Ziglar: If you can dream it, you can achieve it.

What's it all about? What does it all Mean?

Seems to me that they are all saying exactly the same thing. And it is all about the simple truth I alluded to earlier. And that truth is:

We Are The Boss of Us”.

YEP

We Are The Boss of Us”.

Nick and Blame.

Nick Vujicic could have blamed his extrinsic situation. He had more reason than most. But he didn't. He dreamed of a bigger and better future for him and his family. Yes. That's right. He has a wife and children.

Serenity Prayer:

I am reminded here of the Serenity Prayer. I guess you have all heard of it? (Not from Alcoholics Anonymous - I hope).

Grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change, The Courage to change the things I can, and The Wisdom to know the difference.”

The Victim and the Blame (Victim) Game - Work, Weather, Relationships etc:

Speaking of that, How many times have you heard people play the victim game?

Complaining that they can't be happy because of their

  1. Terrible job,

  2. horrible boss,

  3. bills,

  4. childhood experiences,

  5. Their Parents

  6. the bad weather,

  7. Unhappy marriage or a strained relationship?

There's always someone or something else in charge of their lives. Someone else who is to blame. "It's not my fault." is their constant refrain.

"What is it with this stupid phone? Or that driver is an idiot? "

I think you know what I mean.

How many times have you said this kind of thing yourself? I know I used to. A lot. Still do - far too much.

But - I am getting better.  I am aware of it now - and that is the first step.

FINALLY:

Here I am. It's Approximately 2 years later and I am still here. Getting better every day.

1. I'm taking back control.

2. I'm not sitting around lamenting how bad my life is.

3. I'm not accepting the idea that things just happen to me.

That's being a victim.

I remember Susan Jeffers - “Don't be deceived  .... she said. 

Don't be deceived into thinking that by changing the external, the internal will be changed. It works the other way around.

This is clever stuff!!

I bought an AWESOME plaque while I was in Bali recently.

Live Like you will Die Tomorrow.

Dream like you will live forever!!

I plan to live my life from now on based on these simple thoughts, and I am going to think of Nick Vujicic, and just get on with it.

CAUSE - Being in Control

I will be the cause of what happens to me, not the victim of the circumstances in which I find myself.

I will be the CAUSE of what happens to me, not the VICTIM of the circumstances in which I find myself.

I am doing it!!!!!  And IF I CAN DO IT!!!  Who else do you think can do it?

ANYBODY!!!!!!!!!

May The Energy Force Be With You

What is this energy force of which we speak?

As a follow-up from the helping others post of the other day, I thought I'd have a look at this whole scenario from a helicopter viewpoint.

Energy Forces

OK. Let's start with Star Wars. I don't want it to be said that I have dissed the movies; considered them to be not real; so not considered them at all. In fact movies are as real as anything else in our world.

Map Is Not The Territory

In Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP) we say: “The Map is Not The Territory”. By this we mean literally that if you were to draw a map – you should understand that it is only a representation of the reality of the terrain. A picture. A rendition, a translation in two dimensions of the real hills and valleys that exist in nature. It is a best effort to show what this particular piece of nature actually looks like according to the maker of the map. A second map-maker may not see it all (especially where exact measurements are not available) in the same way as the first . And as nature changes the map stays the same. So neither map would be real. They are all just impressions. So is the so-called REALITY of our lives. It is filtered through our senses first; and our brain second. If we are sad - reality may seem less colourful. If we are happy, well .

Movies Are Reality

Hell, where did all that come from? What I was trying to say before I was rudely interrupted, is:  movies are reality. As much as anything else. Our lives are just a movie created by our minds. Wow!

Shakespeare said something similar in Hamlet Act II Scene II For there is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.”

Therefore what is this force of which they speak. Remember? Star Wars? Stay with the program here.

According to Wookiepedia The Force is what gives a Jedi his power. It's an energy field created by all living things. It surrounds us and penetrates us; it binds the galaxy together. It is a metaphysical, spiritual, binding, and ubiquitous power.

Hmmmmm.

Japanese

I think I'm turning Japanese. I really think so. (Apologies to The Vapours for their 'one hit wonder') And when I do I come across the concept of ki. The word means air; atmosphere; flavor; heart; mind; spirit; feelings; humor; an intention; mind; will. The concept – which actually originates in the Chinese culture - is all about the human “emotional state”, about “energy”. ki is variously translated as energy, mind-power, spirit and cosmic breath, and is now most commonly associated with martial arts.

Chinese

I like Chinese. (The literary references abound. This one from Monty Python's Contractual Obligation Album.) So let's look at that.

In traditional Chinese culture, or ch'i forms part of any living thing. Qi literally translates as "breath", "air", or "gas", and figuratively as "material energy", "life force", or "energy flow”. Wikipedia

And even more.

Energy In Other Belief Systems

Prana in the Hindu religion, pneuma in ancient Greece, mana in Hawaiian culture, lüng in Tibetan Buddhism, ruah in Hebrew culture, and vital energy in Western philosophy all say the same thing. Some elements of qi can be understood in the term “energy” when used by writers and practitioners of various esoteric forms of spirituality and alternative medicine. Wikipedia

All these apparently mean energy. All seem to have a basis in the concept of a flow of energy, of a kind of force, of something about you, or any human being, that you can feel.

Sounds like ZEN to me. Funny you should say that. ki was originally taught as a concept by Zen monks.

Zen

As noted in the book by Boyé Lafayette De Mente, “Japan’s Cultural Code Words”, Asians, particularly practitioners of Zen in China and Japan, have long held that there is a force that infuses the cosmos and all things in it, including human beings, and that this force can be developed and directed toward specific tasks and targets. An energy field around us all?

OK. Excellent. But what about auras and kirlian photography? Are these fish of a different kettle? More later. #CareerChangeStrategies

Jillian 32 – Time & Motion

A busy Life

For the start of these episodes go to  https://www.career-change-strategies.com.au/jillian-1-meet-my-friend/

I asked Jillian, once, how she managed time so she could fit so much into her busy life. She always seemed to be occupied with one task or another and they all appeared to just work; and I wondered how it all was managed in the background.

The Exposition

“Cheaper By The Dozen”, she replied somewhat enigmatically.

“Ya what?” I quizzed.

“It's a book,” she said,“ written in 1948, I think. By Frank and Ernestine Gilbreth.”

“It was a biographical novel based on their life.”

“Of course.” I said. Thus earning the first evil eye of the day. I mean a novel based on a person's life would indeed be a biographical novel, wouldn't it?

She continued, “They were two of twelve children and their parents were industrial engineers who specialised in motion study. Father, Frank was particularly obsessed with finding the most efficient ways to complete tasks in life and often used his children as case studies. Mother, Lillian was a psychologist who factored human emotions into the science of the mechanics of motion study.

“I still remember the book – I read it as a child and even today I find myself checking that I am doing stuff in the most time efficient manner. I guess that's how it all fits together

Process Improvement

Today, they'd probably call it Process Improvement and use various models for example: 6 Sigma, SPC, TQM and LEAN to name a few, to explain it.

“While I employ”, she continued, “the normal time management theories of Steven Covey, Steve Pavlina and even your favourite man Tony Robbins's Rapid Planning Method (RPM); I find that doing stuff more efficiently saves huge amounts of time as well. The essence of time management is twofold:

  • Decide what to do
  • Do it.”

(My God she is so sounding like my university lecturers. Of course I just thought this and did not actually SAY anything. I am much more clever than that.)

“I add to this,” she continued the dissertation.

  • “Do it efficiently and effectively.

“Hence the reference to the book 'Cheaper By The Dozen'”

“OK.” I interrupted. “Good. Thanks for this, but my original question was about fitting all the stuff you do into your life. I still don't see how you do it?”

Diary

“Well, that's simple,” she said, “I just put all the stuff I need to do in my diary and figure out what is most important at the time they pop up and do it or postpone it or dump it altogether. A simple process of elimination really. All based on values and my life plan, of course.”

Before getting even more confused, I decided to draw a line in the sand and leave it at that. Except for the book. That time and motion study stuff intrigued me.

Back to the Book

“Tell me more about that book,” I said.

“OK.” she looked up at me, “It might sound a bit silly but here goes. In the book Frank did things like applying shaving cream with two brushes – one on each side of his face - to speed up the process. Now while I, obviously, (and she glared up just daring me to say something. Silence. Discretion being the better part of valour on this occasion) don't do that, I did follow some of his other suggestions re timing of a number of sub-tasks needed to accomplish a larger undertaking. For example - this morning at breakfast I stopped myself to have a little think about whether I should put the toast in before I started the coffee machine. What operation would take the longest and could be done parallel with another, rather than them all being done in series with waiting time in between. Stringing tasks all together in one long critical path seemed more efficient. When it was all over I had about 2 or 3 mins more to relax with coffee before beginning on the next main event. If I do that all the time, for everything I do, I get a lot of free time to myself during and at the end of each day. It's what keeps me sane. And I feel really great when I achieve an efficiency in a task and make my life and time more effective. It is really fantastic.

As I felt a smile gathering itself around my eyes and lips I turned away faking a cough.

“See,” she laughed, “I knew you'd think it was weird.”

Oh Jillian. This time I wished I'd never asked.  #ourjillian

Jillian 31 – Cottage in The Snow

For the start of these episodes go to
https://www.career-change-strategies.com.au/jillian-1-meet-my-friend/

Jillian had a friend, we'll call her Mandy. Sadly she has passed away now, but at the time Jillian knew her she owned a delightful little cottage in a country town a few hours away from a major city in Australia. It was in an area noted for snow - being a few hours from a popular ski resort.

Cottage

The cottage was a two bedroom single story 'in-line' dwelling. By 'in-line' I mean bedroom 1 was at one end and bedroom 2 at the other with the lounge, kitchen, laundry and bathroom in the centre. There was a carport at one end. The whole place was capped with a green painted iron roof and a bull-nose verandah with a timber floored decking which was only about 15 cm above the ground.

Situated up from the road about 500 metres, with the longish driveway meandering through a lovely garden of native plants, shrubs, flowers and large trees; it was idyllic.

Backyard

The back yard – such as it was – where the wood-lean-too lived and the small, low shed for a few garden tools and other implements required for an almost country retreat - pretty much backed directly onto the hill behind. There was a tiny strip of lawn extending from behind the carport to the bedroom at the other end of the home, and a flower bed or two as Mandy loved her little plot of ground in the bush.

This is where Mandy lived and Jillian had been a guest a number of times.

Style

It was an English style retreat with hundreds of knick-knacks which lived on many and various pieces of vintage (elegant) but mismatched furniture pieces. There were crocheted rugs, crocheted anti-macassars and crocheted blankets everywhere. It was not subdued, but all the colours (and it was a multi-coloured place) were more pastel then vibrant.

Relax

It was a stylistic mess, but an absolutely wonderful place to drop out of the world and sit by a huge fireplace with crackling, and sparking logs giving heat and almost all the light in the room. Wine was a requirement and Mandy always had some lovely varieties to share..

She was a great cook and baker and the smell of the latest dish or batch almost always required an immediate taste test whenever anyone visited. Visitors were many and varied. And often. Mandy loved entertaining. And these tastings were successful every time and in every way.

Serenity

Mandy loved it. She adored the serenity and the fact that it was small and cosy, warm when necessary and cool on hot summer days.

Rain on the tin roof was a wondrous thing she had wished for ever since she was a little girl living in a small house in the suburbs. It had taken years, but here it was. Everything she had ever wanted. Mandy was happy, content and completely satisfied. She had her haven, her oasis, her safe harbour.

SNOW

One day it snowed.

And it continued to snow for nearly a week. By the time those in the town realised that this was going to be one mother of all snow storms it was a bit late.

Electricity and phones were failing at an alarming rate. Roads were blocked. Snow was pushed up into huge drifts 1 - 2 metres high on the windward side of any structure and was sloughing off hills and banks to pile up equally high on the sheltered sides of buildings.

To put it mildly it was – well you can't put it mildly. It was turning into a catastrophe. One the townsfolk had not experienced before.

Trapped

After Mandy found she couldn't open her front door, nor see out of the windows on the front of her home she became a little frightened.

Her battery operated transistor radio tuned to the local station was only playing static. So frantically she used her trusty emergency torch to tune to a station some towns away. The announcers were very excitedly explaining that this was going to be a case of staying home and waiting it out. But already Mandy was unable to open the front door or the windows.

In a huge panic she rushed to the back door and thankfully it opened.

But this was not a good sight. The snow had slid off the hill behind and down to the lawn. It was 2 metres high. She could get out of the door but could not get to the wood, the shed or the carport - or anywhere for that matter.

She was trapped.

No power, no phone, no more wood for the fire, a few baked goods and one casserole. The water pipes, she found when thirst drove her to the kitchen, must have burst or frozen as no water could be coaxed out of the tap for love nor money. This was not looking good for Mandy.

Disaster

It was starting to get much darker outside. She began to feel that she couldn't breathe. Mandy's haven, oasis, safe harbour was now nothing but. It was a prison, It was a horror house. It was a shelter no more.

She could not sit, she could not sleep, get warm, nor eat, nor drink. Reading and relaxing was obviously completely out of the question. Panicked pacing was the order of the day.

For some hours she just wore out a trail from one end of the house to the other.

The excitement she had felt at having her own beautiful place disappeared in a trice and was replaced by fear and loathing. She began to worry if she would get out alive. The walls seemed to be closing in. The roof was getting lower. Everything was dark and dire. Sounds were muffled by the huge buffer of snow between her and the rest of the world. Not that the rest of the world was doing much of anything that would make noise anyway. All was quiet. All was still. It was unreal.

Eventually Mandy fell asleep on the rug in front of the very dead and very cold fire.

Discovery

She was discovered, some day and a half after this, curled up in the foetal position, still in-front of the fireplace; very tired, very cold, hungry, dehydrated and more scared than anyone should ever be at home alone.

Luckily the local emergency volunteers had managed to get themselves mobile and had begun a house to house to find anyone who might have been trapped. Fortunate for Mandy

Mandy sold the cottage that summer and moved back into the city. Never to be a country girl thereafter. Of course Jillian didn't get to stay there again. #ourjillian

Crewing – Tony Robbins Sydney 2015

Unleash The Power Within

Well. Can't say too much or I'll have to kill you. Or they'll kill me. Or all of the above.

Secrecy

I signed a secrecy provision so what follows will be of necessity general and not secret.

One of the main themes we crew are asked to embrace was flexibility. Seems mine started on the early side. My 7.35 am flight on Wednesday was cancelled as were all Jet-Star flights early that morning as far as I could tell.

Flexibility

Mine and the airline. I was efficiently re-booked on an 11.50 am flight the same day. That was very serendipitous. Required a change of plans at the other end,but we aced that.

Instead of popping in to my fabulous AirBnB accommodation to drop off bags and things like that, I had to head directly to the Qantas Credit Union Arena. Do not pass go. Do not do anything. Grab a VERY QUICK bite to eat at Paddy's Market and Bob's your uncle. I had 2 pork Gyoza for $4.50. Nice, but not much. And as I found out later – I needed much.

But let’s not get ahead of ourselves.

Travel Club

Managed to sign up for a travel club in Sydney airport while waiting for my luggage and chatted to a chap who liked to travel while I was waiting for the light rail at Central Station to take me to the venue. All very cool. By he way I was not responsible for the fire at Hungry Jacks at that very station on Saturday evening.

The Event

Back to the event. The days were long and brutal, We worked hard. All of us; venue staff, event staff, volunteers and all. Averaged about 5-6 hours sleep per night. But it was worth it.

I stayed at a lovely little 2-up 3-down terrace house in Surrey Hills. It was gorgeous. A brothel (Jack told me, but I had noticed the big red light) on one side and a coffee/lunch shop next door but one on the other side, and then a corner pub. It was 10 mins walk to the venue and about 5 mins walk to the aforementioned Central Station. Yep. Very central. As expected Sydney was wet for a few of the days.

People

Only problem was Jack and Stephanie would have loved to have shared a leisurely glass of wine at least once during the 5 nights I was staying with them, but it was not to be. Maybe next time. There will very likely be a next time. I hope so anyway.

I met so many wonderful people; saw again some from last year (Sandy) and ran into a couple of coaching mates (Pina and Julia). Just to name a few. It was a bit like old-home-week. I loved it. New friends galore.

Sessions

We even managed to see a few moments of the sessions as well, when we had a break from serving the participants. Tony Robbins was awesome as expected.

Pilot Fail

Jillian 30 – Pilot Licence Mega FAIL!

Pilot Licence

For the start of these episodes go to
https://www.career-change-strategies.com.au/jillian-1-meet-my-friend/

Every now and then Jillian tells me a snippet of something or other and then we move on and the information becomes lost in the mists of - well not time, necessarily - but forgetfulness and insignificance shall we say?

Some time ago, while trawling through my notes, I came across an item about one of her friends failing his private pilot's licence in interesting circumstances.

I asked about this again.

Seems this chap had been doing quite well – handling your basic up and down stuff; emergency landings (where you have your experienced pilot teacher reach around you and shut down the engines when you least expect it - and then say to you, “You have about 45 seconds to find a place to land.”

Oh and you ought to find some smoke to tell you the way the wind is blowing because you MUST land with the plane facing into the wind; and you need at least x number of metres to land and it must be clear of obstacles like phone or power poles and wires, holes, small hills, hedges, trees, fences, houses, bicycles and I suppose roads and people but he apparently didn't mention some of these things. They were to be expected, Jillian seemed to imply. Then there were stalls (you know where the training pilot makes the aeroplane almost fall out of the sky – the “Oh dear What are we going to do now?” moments; scary almost vertical spiralling dives and all things in between.

Some of these included heaps of memorizing particular aircraft bits and pieces, radio jargon (you know the Alpha, Beta, Delta … Romeo, Juliet things) and having at your fingertips reams of important weather information, weight calculations and navigational ephemera.

I mean, “There is so much to know,” I said to Jillian after listening to this for some time, “Why would you ever WANT to have a pilot's licence?” “A pilot needs to be a walking encyclopedia.”

But he, apparently, knew it all so it was time to take the figurative bit between the teeth and make a bid for the licence. At least the first of, I think she said 2 or 3 parts of the full licence.

Towards the end of the hour of the actual licence exam which had gone quickly and seemingly satisfactorily, the tester asked the pilot to return to the airfield.

Now this requires a square pattern to be executed, Jillian explained to me. You need initially to head for a point, a known and previously agreed upon landmark on the ground, and then turn towards the runway which will be to your front and right (probably) some 5 or so kilometers away. Hopefully you can see this aforementioned runway, but if not just head in the general direction.

Landing requires you to pass the runway at right angles, turn downwind and run alongside this landing strip, turn across wind with the runway at right angles to you and then turn facing forwards down the length of this narrow strip of grass with the wind now blowing toward you, and execute the landing. Did I mention you needed to know which way the wind is blowing (if there is any wind) before starting any of this manoeuvring?

Well, our friend reached this landmark, executed the turn towards the airport and runway which he could see in the distance and was heading in to do the square pattern landing, secure in the knowledge that his licence was in the bag.

Imagine his surprise when the examiner asked him what he was doing. Of course he explained he was doing as he was told. Heading in to land the aeroplane after reaching the previously defined ground landmark.

“OK.” said the examiner, “Why are you STILL doing this?”

At this point Jillian's friend smelled a rat and said,”Am I missing something, Jim?”

“You might say.” said Jim. “There is an emergency. All traffic in the area has been asked by radio to avoid the airport for the next 10 minutes or so. You, specifically, have been asked to turn away to port (left for those not used to this language) and to not attempt to land, in order to make way for this temporary emergency state. You have ignored these instructions - given 3 or 4 times with increasing urgency; and air-traffic controllers have had to re-route several other aircraft out of your way, even the helicopter with the emergency situation.”

“I am afraid, if you cannot follow simple radio instructions, I am not going to be able to approve you for your licence. You are a menace to other aircraft and the flying public.”

I think that constitutes a mega-fail. Don't you? #ourjillian

Rules and Public Venues. Stupid

Stupid

This is me. Colin. Not Jillian and not Career Change Strategies. And it is possibly a wee bit of a rant.

Are we ready for a rant?

Al-right.

Rules-Rant

I was at a musical event the other night and there were tables covering the bottom level facing the stage for those that could afford them and the great unwashed (me) had to sit upstairs in moveable old theatre style chair sets.

It was not uncomfortable. I'm not complaining about that. But we were a fair way from the action.

I didn’t enjoy the show itself much. I thought the sound was muddy (at least the voices were) guitar was crisp and clean. I think it was the sound man's need to fill the spectrum with echo and reverb and other techie stuff. They really should get over themselves and make it all about the music. Is that too much to ask? And the artist pointedly noted that she would NOT be doing any songs written by a writer that a good portion of the audience wanted to hear. She does them amazingly. A tad arrogant I thought. But I digress.

Problem #1

We had our wine glasses on a small ledge in front of us. We were told by a security woman to remove them. She was smiling and trying to be polite and pleasant, but I was not really convinced.

The reason given for said removal was; in-case they fell or were spilled onto the higher paying customers below. This in spite of the fact that the cast-iron rail and balustrading would have ensured that any falling or spilling would have been onto our feet. Hmmmmm.

  • Was this a real rule? Really?

  • Was it an on the spot made-up rule by the security woman to justify her existence?

  • or perhaps, more likely, the mad ravings of a power hungry venue owner/manager who could not operate without a page or two of rules that MUST be followed in order to cover his backside from all or any eventuality; no matter how disruptive the rule is nor how unlikely the eventuality actually was. Stupid.

Problem #2

This one would be funny if it wasn't weird. Well no. The word again is stupid.

There was a balcony kind of affair half-way up the stairway to our little special place. I guess you'd call it a landing. It was fenced off very securely, from the main floor below. The configuration was stairs, landing, then more stairs Stair parts were normal stair width. The landing was actually twice as wide as the stair part. Are you getting this? And therefore there was a lovely bit of carpeted standing room halfway up to the to the upstairs seating where more of the general admission people could view the artist. Great.

Not-so great.

You see our lovely security guard moved these people on as well. A reason was called for. Several were given

  1. Fire or emergency access. (Such as medical or other) These people were off the line of the stairs and would have not impeded anyone attempting to use these facilities in an emergency.

  2. Dangerous. People might fall over or through the railing onto the floor below. We noted that the railing was pretty much the same as that in front of us on the top floor. Not very likely anyone would fall over it or break it. Not unless it was a wine glass of course.

  3. Likely to collapse. Well there was a whole room under this structure. And the area was obviously an extension of the stair landing, open for access (no velvet ropes here) and carpeted. So perhaps this was just a made-up reason on the spur of the moment as well.

  4. OK for me though. Yep. You guessed it. The security guard spent most of the show actually leaning on this unsafe railing in the landing/balcony space. Great view. Fantastic sound I'd reckon.

I just hate rules that are stupid, have no basis in scientific or any other discipline and are completely unfairly applied. Oh. Did I say STUPID? What about You?

Reminded me of another time at a gig at the Palais Theatre in St Kilda Melbourne. People were stopped from enjoying themselves. Something they had all paid to do. This was the whole point of the show. Or so I thought.

  • They were retrained (again by your arrogant and generally large security guards) from standing in their seats (not on – that would be wrong) and energetically moving to the music.

  • They were not allowed to dance in the aisles.

Reasons:

  1. Standing impedes (no that was my word – not the guard. Sorry) the view of others. Surely not any more than sitting, if everyone was doing it. And everyone was. Stupid.

  2. Aisle dancing is dangerous as it impedes (my word again) escape if there is a fire. Not sure if I am right here, but my logic tells me that if there was a fire - people would be getting themselves to the aisles to exit the building as fast as possible. Oh. That's where these dancers already were. And on their feet. Might actually save time? Hmmmmm. Stupid.